Thank you. I have two thoughts on this. First, the sticks and stones metaphor confused me horribly when I was growing up. I couldn’t square it with my hurt over being called malicious names by my verbally abusive, war-damaged father. Trying to not feel beat-up was hard. Christian therapy helped me to see that words really can hurt, so use them wisely. Second, the monetary support for Shiloh and Karmelo is beyond disturbing, but you’ve cogently explained why white people cannot retreat to a corner where it’s OK for them to “restore” the n-word to normalcy. At the same time, I have to say that black folks need a return to the ethically-based recognition of “real” injuries and rejection of wholesale victim thinking. I was never a fan of the “micro-aggression” concept. Frankly, it’s what can lead to concluding that someone like Karmelo Anthony is a “victim,” when Anthony killed the real victim, Austin Metcalf. And Shiloh Hendrix intentionally perpetrated verbal harm on a small kid. So she’s not a victim either. Of course, being doxed is an injury, but I suspect both Anthony and Hendrix are exaggerating their doxing situations. That’s just my speculation, and any exaggeration won’t stop them from raking in the cash.
Anyway, I’m saying all of this as a black, former staunch civil rights advocate. Retired now. The world has simply gone mad, and only God can right this ship. But thanks for your part in bringing moral clarity to the landscape.
A few times in my life I've suffered severe physical pain, but nothing has ever hurt me more deeply and/or enduringly than words. We would do well to be as careful with them as we are (or would be) with any dangerous weapon.
Excellent! My parents did not meet the 21st century definition of enlightened in terms of race, but uttering that particular word had immediate negative consequences like unto the use of four letter expressions. When it is used as an epithet, it merits condemnation.
Ya know, I certainly don't wish anger on you - but you are an excellent writer when you are angry! As a lawyer, constitutional scholar (and aspiring biblical scholar), I agree with every word you wrote about speech. Rehnquist used to say, freedom comes with responsibility (or something like that). Free speech requires responsible speech... or we will lose it. Freedom requires, and should engender, wisdom. Or we will lose it.
Also, as a father of a college-age daughter (a leftist, but I love her anyway :) ), who has dated a Black guy since high school (a wonderful young man whom I love dearly...but don't tell him!), I have seen first-hand the pain that words can cause. I have seen their fear to even walk into a restaurant as a mixed-race couple... in New York. My father (God rest his soul) was a Klansman and an early founder of the John Birch Society; I grew up literally watching crosses burn in the yards of Black people in the South, and attending sick Klan "ceremonies". Although I am a conservative, I (and my Father before he passed) long ago learned how wrong all of these things are. If anyone calls my daughter's boyfriend the "n word," they're gonna learn what it feels like to have a 12 guage shoved down their throat. (Of course I don't meant that, but emotionally, I do.)
Thank you for a remarkable article. I'm sharing it.
Brilliantly argued—although I fear the argument falls on stone deaf ears and will never penetrate even stonier hearts. That said, I deeply appreciate the opportunity to hear in your words what I feel in my whole soul. Thanks, Kaeley.
This is a great article. Words can do untold damage. It is interesting that in many of the Psalms, David cries out to God about his enemies’ words (taunts, slander, lies). They weighed on him and he sought God’s help. In the New Testament, James had a lot to say about the destructive power of the tongue (James 3). Knowing how damaging words can be should make me want to guard my words carefully.
Thank you! This is such an important article. I would just add that yes, an unrenewed heart is wicked, but Ezekiel 36:26 says, "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." As Christians, we have a new heart and a new nature, so when we follow the council of the Holy Spirit and check our actions against what the Bible says, following our hearts is a very good thing.
Another great article! Thank you. I agree that words can hurt and that they matter.
Personally, I always felt the 'sticks and stones' motto was more aspirational than descriptive. What I took away from that expression was, "you shouldn't let other people's opinion affect how you think about yourself." Aspirational, because of course hurtful words DO affect us. Importantly, it depends on the source of the vitriol. When Trantifa yells insults at me (like they did last night at the Riley Gaines event in Seattle), I just laugh because I have zero respect for those numbskulls. Conversely, harsh words from a loved one can devastate. I'm glad you dug into this topic!
Lovely, honest. I may not agree with 100% of this (but I could never write like this, either, so there's that)...I always need to be mindful of my words/how I say things, and, finally "guard your heart" is good advice for all of us...Christian or not.
Thank you. I have two thoughts on this. First, the sticks and stones metaphor confused me horribly when I was growing up. I couldn’t square it with my hurt over being called malicious names by my verbally abusive, war-damaged father. Trying to not feel beat-up was hard. Christian therapy helped me to see that words really can hurt, so use them wisely. Second, the monetary support for Shiloh and Karmelo is beyond disturbing, but you’ve cogently explained why white people cannot retreat to a corner where it’s OK for them to “restore” the n-word to normalcy. At the same time, I have to say that black folks need a return to the ethically-based recognition of “real” injuries and rejection of wholesale victim thinking. I was never a fan of the “micro-aggression” concept. Frankly, it’s what can lead to concluding that someone like Karmelo Anthony is a “victim,” when Anthony killed the real victim, Austin Metcalf. And Shiloh Hendrix intentionally perpetrated verbal harm on a small kid. So she’s not a victim either. Of course, being doxed is an injury, but I suspect both Anthony and Hendrix are exaggerating their doxing situations. That’s just my speculation, and any exaggeration won’t stop them from raking in the cash.
Anyway, I’m saying all of this as a black, former staunch civil rights advocate. Retired now. The world has simply gone mad, and only God can right this ship. But thanks for your part in bringing moral clarity to the landscape.
A few times in my life I've suffered severe physical pain, but nothing has ever hurt me more deeply and/or enduringly than words. We would do well to be as careful with them as we are (or would be) with any dangerous weapon.
Excellent! My parents did not meet the 21st century definition of enlightened in terms of race, but uttering that particular word had immediate negative consequences like unto the use of four letter expressions. When it is used as an epithet, it merits condemnation.
Ya know, I certainly don't wish anger on you - but you are an excellent writer when you are angry! As a lawyer, constitutional scholar (and aspiring biblical scholar), I agree with every word you wrote about speech. Rehnquist used to say, freedom comes with responsibility (or something like that). Free speech requires responsible speech... or we will lose it. Freedom requires, and should engender, wisdom. Or we will lose it.
Also, as a father of a college-age daughter (a leftist, but I love her anyway :) ), who has dated a Black guy since high school (a wonderful young man whom I love dearly...but don't tell him!), I have seen first-hand the pain that words can cause. I have seen their fear to even walk into a restaurant as a mixed-race couple... in New York. My father (God rest his soul) was a Klansman and an early founder of the John Birch Society; I grew up literally watching crosses burn in the yards of Black people in the South, and attending sick Klan "ceremonies". Although I am a conservative, I (and my Father before he passed) long ago learned how wrong all of these things are. If anyone calls my daughter's boyfriend the "n word," they're gonna learn what it feels like to have a 12 guage shoved down their throat. (Of course I don't meant that, but emotionally, I do.)
Thank you for a remarkable article. I'm sharing it.
Brilliantly argued—although I fear the argument falls on stone deaf ears and will never penetrate even stonier hearts. That said, I deeply appreciate the opportunity to hear in your words what I feel in my whole soul. Thanks, Kaeley.
This is a great article. Words can do untold damage. It is interesting that in many of the Psalms, David cries out to God about his enemies’ words (taunts, slander, lies). They weighed on him and he sought God’s help. In the New Testament, James had a lot to say about the destructive power of the tongue (James 3). Knowing how damaging words can be should make me want to guard my words carefully.
Thank you! This is such an important article. I would just add that yes, an unrenewed heart is wicked, but Ezekiel 36:26 says, "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." As Christians, we have a new heart and a new nature, so when we follow the council of the Holy Spirit and check our actions against what the Bible says, following our hearts is a very good thing.
Another great article! Thank you. I agree that words can hurt and that they matter.
Personally, I always felt the 'sticks and stones' motto was more aspirational than descriptive. What I took away from that expression was, "you shouldn't let other people's opinion affect how you think about yourself." Aspirational, because of course hurtful words DO affect us. Importantly, it depends on the source of the vitriol. When Trantifa yells insults at me (like they did last night at the Riley Gaines event in Seattle), I just laugh because I have zero respect for those numbskulls. Conversely, harsh words from a loved one can devastate. I'm glad you dug into this topic!
Lovely, honest. I may not agree with 100% of this (but I could never write like this, either, so there's that)...I always need to be mindful of my words/how I say things, and, finally "guard your heart" is good advice for all of us...Christian or not.